Under Achiever Analyses Decisions and Contemplates Future.

I’m Sean, 27, from the Rhondda and I don’t know where the hell my life is going.

If that sounds a bit like therapy, I’m glad. I think I need it!

I left school at 18 with the intention of working in construction as a project manager. Off to uni I went, best intentions in one hand, a pint in the other to study Project (construction) Management. Hated it. Wasn’t good at it. My mother says it’s because I liked to party too much. Sorry Mam!

It took me three years, including a repeat year to realise I needed to quit. What a waste of time and money.

How did I come to this conclusion? Lets start from the beginning..

I was into my sports, excelled at rugby and wanted to be part of elite sport either through my own talent or as a paid employee. To reinforce my point my two work experience posts through school were with Rhondda Schools Rugby and the great Chris Jones and to a gym in the Quality Inn Hotel, Tongwynlais. But I decided to go into construction because I ‘knew’ I’d make a decent living!

Based on the earning of some friends in the construction industry I would have been proved right. But to really emphasise why I wasn’t cut out for it would you believe me if I said that I had an E in design and technology? An E! My a-level results weren’t good either.

To be honest I should never have been allowed into Uni!

Quitting Project Management

When I finally realised that project management wasn’t for me I thought long and hard what to do next. I looked for jobs, but I didn’t want a dead-end job, which ultimately meant there were no suitable jobs!

Around the same time I was working as a lifeguard on the paddling pools in Ystrad Rhondda and I recall talking to someone about training and nutrition and thought, yep, that’s what I should have done to start with. So I proceeded to look for a course in nutrition or erm psychology but that’s a different story completely. Nutrition won because that’s what I could get on, on short notice. The actual course was Nutrition, Physical Activity and Community Health but I stammer and nutrition sounds cooler that a 5 minute block.

The course was a breath of fresh air for me. I enjoyed the learning and I excelled at it. I wasn’t as thick as project management made me think I was!

I graduated with a 2:1. Should of had a 1st had I not spent my last year, chasing the Herbalife scam dream.

I couldn’t get a job for love nor money relating to my degree after graduation, so I worked part-time in a shop, quit to work in the Steel Works as a labourer (good money), quit that, rejoined a shop, quit that for Betfred until eventually I got into Public Health Wales as an Abdominal Aortic Aneurysm Screener. A job Closer to where I wanted to be but ultimately light-years away to where I thought I should be.

You see, when you work in an organisation like the NHS, you come to realise that, career progression takes time, people are in jobs who shouldn’t be and master degrees are all the rage if you want to get on. I’ve recently left that job and grateful to my former managers for taking a chance on me. They got me closer to where I want to be!

Now I’m a Stop Smoking Development Worker for Public Health Wales and here lies the problem..

I am even closer to where I want to be (not in pay)- a Health Promotion Practitioner, but light-years away at the same time.

This whole dilemma leads me to question where the hell I’m going. In my mind I’ve got three options:

1, Stay in NHS, maybe do a Master’s Degree in Public Health, stay on shit money for longer, hope a Health Promotion Practitioner Job comes up and pray someone gives me a job.
2, Set up a nutrition coaching company. I love learning about nutrition and training, so get further qualified and start to coach people. Problem is, my reading hasn’t resulted in 6 pack abs. Biggest obstacle is my waist line. This will have to be a business, no jobs in this field!
3, Learn Web Development. See this will look random to you, but somewhere in-between my recent life story I have developed a passion for coding. This will take time to learn but there are plenty of jobs in a growing industry. Although, I’d prefer to freelance from the word go- better lifestyle.

And here’s the catch(s):

1, Naive maybe, but I’ve been sold the internet dream. I want to work from home or a coffee shop or a beach maybe. I strongly believe this is achievable and with a kid on the way, I really want this to happen. Option 1 will never give me this.
2, I’ve just taken a pay cut to do my current job so I’m even more skint than I was before. I need/want extra money immediately. Option 2 potentially gives me that if I work alongside my current job but quite frankly, I’m currently fat!
3, I’ve got a kid on the way, so the next job/business needs to be long-term and safe. Option 1 gives me this but doesn’t give me the ‘internet lifestyle’ or financial independence. Option 3 potential gives me this but is a long learning curve. Potential 2 years self learning, 2 more years shit pay after that. Option 2, is risky.

I’ve learnt my lessons from chasing money through project management, Herbashite and the steel works. I’ve also been caught with my pants down with Betfred, AAA screening and my current job. So I’ve got to really consider what I do next because it’s going to be a long-term choice. God help me.

The turmoil is killing me! I sometimes think, and I’ve done this for the last 2 months, I should accept my lot and live pay to pay resenting other who get on. But that’s not me. Not at all.

They lie to you in education. Life isn’t perfect if you pass your exams. You don’t go straight to the top.

Far from it.

Why are we in a rush?

Note: I wrote this about 2 months ago when I initially planned to launch my blog.  Think I took the rush thing too far? No, I took procrastination to a whole new level.

 

Why are we in a rush to do everything? Why has everything got to happen almost immediately or its not worth doing? In this post I ponder these questions and air my views.

The other week I caught myself procrastinating as usual. I had loads of things I could of been doing to achieve some of goals but I was googling stuff instead.  The topic of my Google questions was Web Development. See, Web Development is what I’d like to be doing in the long term. I see it as a great career in a thriving industry but I can’t get there quick enough.   I want it now!

So I googled something along the lines of “How long will it take me to become a web developer?”  I came across a blog which asked why are people in a rush to become web developers.  The author challenged his readers to go into their local bookstore and look at the books about programming.  Citing the fact that you’d find books on how learn programming languages in a day or a week and how ridiculous a premise this is.  If things were that easy, everyone would do it!

That blog made me question a lot of my thought processes around many of my daily activities.  For example, I really want/need to lose some weight and starting eating right again. It’s a priority of mine to do so and I want to do it quickly. But, I just can’t do it.  I can’t get started because I know its going to be a long process. It completely overwhelms me.

Another example is that I once wanted to become a freelance nutritionist.  Great idea and something I thought I could do but I wanted to have PHD level knowledge in a couple of months. Wasn’t happening!!! I got overwhelmed and kind of drifted away from the idea.

The same process is kind of happening at the moment with my dream of becoming a web developer.  And I could mention other scenarios but I don’t want this blog to be tedious.  I just can’t get to where I want to be quick enough argh.

But why? Why am I/we so impatient.

I think there could be a few explanations for this behaviour.

Firstly, it may be because I’m spoilt. My parents have given me almost everything I ever wanted because they’re bloody good parents.  They’d do/give anything for me and my siblings and if they could do it immediately they would. So that’s one possibility.

Secondly, I think its because we are in an age of instant access.  We have superstores, fast food outlets and call centres open 24/7. If we want it, we get it.  If we have to wait for it, we go elsewhere where we can get it.  We are a victim of our own success.

Lastly, I think we take for granted how long things actually take to happen. We don’t get fat in one week- It takes years.  We didn’t pass GCSE’s/A levels in a year- It was the cumulative effort of years of schooling. The iPhone that we see today is the sum of years of development and upgrades in technology.

 

I should really start respecting the time and effort it takes to do anything meaningful.

Rome wasn’t build in a day after all…

Blog? Why? What for?

I’ve started another blog. But why? What purpose will it serve? This post will try to explain my reasoning behind starting a blog and why it will be different from other blogs that I have started and failed.

People who know me will probably roll their eyes at the prospect of me starting another blog.  To be fair there’s been a few-

  • SeanMorganHealth
  • WelshWeightLoss
  • HealthStyleUk
  • EatMoveLean
  • and a few more.

This is actually about the 5th iteration of this blog/website.  I started trying to sell my services as a nutritionist, then I tried to use it as on online CV, then as a nutritionist again, a web development portfolio and now this. On previous iterations of this blog I’ve always tried to monetise immediately. Whenever I didn’t get the success needed I didn’t feel that the time investment was worth it so I’d give up.

Additionally, I’m a procrastinator and a collector of information.  So much so, I’d start a blog, blog for a bit, read about blogging and get paralysed by the information read and decide that I haven’t got enough time to participate in this personal hobby. Absolutely ridiculous!

The difference with this iteration is that I’m not putting pressure on myself.  Why? Because the financial pressure of paying for a wedding and house deco is over.  I feel I can just write about what I want without pressure of increasing reader numbers and worrying whether the content is niche enough. Phew!

I’m also not going to let blogging guru websites overwhelm me, instead  I’m going to implement what I know, learn what I don’t and write about it.

Lastly, and to answer the ‘Why Blog” section in the headline this blog is ultimately for me to write about my experiences, what I’ve learnt and share the some of the crazy thoughts that come into my mind from time to time. It’s for me to look back on in the future and realise what kind of person I was and the progress I’ve made.  It’s also a way for me to participate in the wonderful world of the web and contribute somewhat to public debate.  And, if what I write helps, entertains and provokes at least one person then it’s a worthwhile time investment.

Sure, I could do most of that in a personal diary/journal and keep my thoughts to myself like they did in the past.  But that seems incredibly old fashioned for a modern guy.

I’m vein enough to own a domain name, why not use it and participate in the wonderful blogosphere.

Keep posted for more posts in the future.